Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Waiting and Remembering

I spend my time
Waiting for my coffee
With the other
Monday morning customers.
They are oblivious
To the girl
With the ransacked soul
In their midst.
My eyes are filled
With visions
Of him,
Of her,
Of them…
An endless nightmare
Replaying over and over
Until their faces blur
Into a whirling fog
Of betrayal
Wrapping itself
Around me,
A belt of treachery
Paralyzing my emotions.

The line moves forward,
And his pleading
For that second chance
Rings in my ears,
His denials
Of the truth
I plainly see
Tangled in the sheets
Of my bed,
As the crowd
Around me laments
The upcoming colder weather.

The line moves forward again,
And I return to
The long hours of weeping,
The hopelessness of living
In a world tinged with regrets,
The knowledge
I would gladly trade
For the blissful ignorance
I lost when I walked
Through that door.  

The line moves forward yet again,
And I find myself
At the counter,
The clerk’s smiley face sticker
Mocking my own stony expression.
He tries to engage
In his usual gentle flirtation,
But his charms are
Completely wasted
On my ransacked soul
Lying lost in my own
Confidential melancholy.


Sherry Blue Sky said...

A sad poem about the disappointing side of love.........well written, and definitely resonates with anyone - everyone? - who has ever been disappointed by love.

Ann Grenier said...

Very authentic sounding feelings written in flowing, convincing language. I feel empathy for this woman who has to move through the mundane steps of life in spite of the all-consuming hurt invisible to others.

Marian said...

aw :(
i like "confidential melancholy."

Claudia said...

love that you place this in the waiting line...and then you slowly drift from outside to inside...very naturally, very deep, very melancholic..and then get back in the end into the line again...very nice..

Marbles in My Pocket said...

This is a terrific write; sad, but very well done. So vivid, it makes one feel they are behind you in the line; or actually you. Awesome write!

Brian Miller said...

def a nice write...i love teh coffee shop and how true in that we dont know what is going on in the people around us...until we ask and they either answer or they more person in line...

Mary said...

Don't you just hate it when invasive thoughts interfere as you are just trying to get yourself a cup of coffee???

S.E. Ingraham said...

Kind of refreshing - if downright melancholic - amidst all the sentimental stuff - on Valentine's Day ... I thought I'd written something fairly typical but every time I ready it, it sounds more

brenda w said...

Oh Mary, this is sad. Betrayal is an ugly beast. Excellent write, I enjoyed the way her thoughts moved us with her through the line.

Sara McNulty said...

Wow! Dark side rules here, and beautifully.

booguloo said...

I know this so well:
"On my ransacked soul
Lying lost in my own
Confidential melancholy"

At least we have a way of letting these feelings flow off the end of our pens.