It’s a conspiracy, I tell you.
It all started
With a few crinkles
Around the eyes
(Laugh lines? Do I look like I’m laughing?)
They must have decided
They liked the scenery
And stuck around.
And they invited friends.
Great.
Then the occasional ache
In my weary bones,
Growing more and more frequent,
Until the creaks and groans
Became my morning mantra
When rising to face the day,
Every day.
Great.
And the hormones,
The hormones,
Oh my God, the hormones!
I’m too hot.
I’m too cold.
I’m too hot.
I’m too cold.
I need a new thermostat!
And those mood swings
Have me looking
Not to my doctor
But an exorcist
For assistance.
Great.
Oh, that cruel joke of gravity,
Converting body parts
From perky to plummeting?
Not funny.
Not cool.
Mother Nature and Father Time,
The banes of my existence,
I demand a map,
A schedule,
Something to help me navigate
This minefield of aging gracefully.
You’ll be right on that, right?
Great.
11 comments:
OK, maybe this entry is a little more ranting prose than poetry, but I feel so much better!
haha..nice..laughed at the wrinkles inviting friends..let them come and have a party...together with the hormones and everything...celebrating the wisdom and humor that comes with the aging as well...smiles
a map would be nice...you could plan your life around them...ha...this was fun...but also the serious undertone...i hope when my time comes i do it with grace...i think there is beauty in all ages honestly
Oh, Mary, you have written a piece here with which many can identify. My favorite was the first stanza!
I don't think it's rant. There's so much truth in it, and said with a bit of sarcasm. Your ability to capture the nature of the stuff that goes on at this time are so spot on. Being a spouse of someone undergoing the change, I know a little about it. This makes it even more real. Thank you.
Mary - this is brilliant! You captured what we all want to say when we face the crinkles and less perkies. Wonderfully done!
I can so relate to every line....from wrinkkles to plumeting! Love this poem....a wonderfully humorous way to look at a part of life that can be so unpleasant! :-)
Aging is great mentally but not so, physically.The gravity plumetting and sagging takes the shine off it a bit.
Youth is definitely wasted on the young.
I agree where's the map or the magic pill to make it go away? Natures' cruel joke.
(Catching up very late, sorry.)
I can only say, as an old performance-poet myself (as we used to call it) this is a terrific performance piece! I think you must be no stranger to the spoken word. :)
OK,so I am 'of that age' too. Time's stealth qualities could be a military top secret weapon - if it could be harnessed. I love your poem. It says,so amusingly, what it is to age.
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